I lost 12 pounds in the last two weeks just from doing this one thing!

Yes that’s right – despite all the excesses of Christmas, I have lost 12 pounds without changing any of my normal eating habits, or exercising, at all!

Just click here for …

Okay, I can’t do it any more, the motivation for this post is probably the reason that you clicked on it – the lousy clickbait titles that seem to be popping up everywhere, filling my Facebook news feed because my beloved Facebook friends keep clicking on them.

You know the type, it usually involves weight loss, making money, or the most amusing, something sexual. You can spot them a mile off, pseudo ‘news’-type articles that include a headline (and an awful image) that should cause alarm bells to ring:

“You won’t believe what this girl did in front of her class!”
“This guy makes over $2000 a day by doing nothing!”
“Four tips to get ripped!”

Yep, they appeal to the lowest common denominators for our society: money, image and sex.

Of course the heading rarely matches the article, and the whole thing is made up. At best you end up on a crap website that you quickly leave, at worst you may end up infecting your computer with malware, spyware, chlamydia or something equally nasty.

Sure you’re tech savvy, you aren’t one of the ones who clicks on these articles (except for now, gotcha!) but it doesn’t stop your friends doing so, and in my cases it is usually my older relatives.

Remember folks, if something sounds too good to be true, it normally is.

So this post is just a little rant as these clickbait posts are really frustrating me, so please stop clicking them, for me?

So what do you get from reading this? Not a great deal I’m afraid, but here is a small owl:

Oh I nearly forgot! How did I lose the weight? Good question, it’s a hell of an achievement isn’t it.

I have achieved it by lying, I haven’t lost any weight, I made it up – consider my pants on fire right now. In fact, I’ve probably put at least six pounds on (I don’t want to weigh to check thanks); those chocolate oranges have got a lot to answer for.

So there we gave it, I’m misrepresenting this post just as every clickbait post seems to, so don’t believe the hype, challenge everything and a few other clichés.

Just don’t click those posts x

P.S. Just before I posted this I saw what may be my favourite one so far, here is a genuine screenshot – I promise you. Yep, one of my Facebook friends clicked on it:

Don’t forget – one like = respect, don’t scroll without liking, comment to pray for Corden (or the children maybe), repeat ad infinitum (more likely ad naseum).

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